HOROSCOPE April-May by W:. Leon Calafiore
Aries (Mar21-Apr20): It is better, my dear, to glide to the kitchen and refresh your drink, then return to your porch or stadium seat, and watch the carnage unfold. Much as you might want to dip a toe in, it’s better to be a contented observer, rather than an overwrought participant.
Taurus (Apr 21-May20): The journal of your travails could be written on a postage stamp, without abbreviations. Bellowing to others about a hangnail, when the building has fallen on someone else’s head lacks charm, which you do possess. Pay some out, and win bigger dividends.
Gemini (May 21-June 21): If you’re loving more and enjoying it less, it’s not that you’re not making your case, only that no one can hear you. Don’t work yourself into a state; the force field blocking you should dissipate before the Summer Solstice, when Mercury goes direct. Won’t friends be surprised to see you!
Cancer (June 22-July 22): Is you is, or is you isn’t? In particular, for you July babies, it’s so difficult to know, with the Moon hitting both the fast forward and rewind button, occasionally at the same time. The ringing in your ears is an echo of two competing ideas colliding.
Leo (July 23-Aug 22): The end of July is particularly fine for you to move out from under the shade tree and pounce. It’s not that you should be a lazy feline during June; take that time to marshal the facts important to your case. You may succeed in your coup d’etat.
Virgo (Aug 23-Sept 22): During the second week of June you will experience a marked increase in horse-trading, baseball card swapping, or whatever else is your favorite means or exchanging one valued thing for another. This could lead to going through partners like tissues. Remember to pick up a new supply at the store.
Libra (Sept 23-Oct 22): There’s a glow about you which (fortunately) has nothing to do with radioactivity, or any other variety of decay. It will seem as if you’ve been away for expensive spa treatments, but you weren’t. Your slightest suggestion will be met with applause (Lunch, why didn’t I think of that? How smart!). Enjoy!
Scorpio (Oct 23-Nov 21): The stars conspire to provide a perfect storm of creativity the week before the Solstice. People will wonder at your stop and start motions as you search through pockets to find a scrap on which to jot down a thought. Just remember, not every concept is million dollar; it’s not all good, just a good beginning.
Sagittarius (Nov 22-Dec 21): The pacesetter doesn’t get to win, but does set the tone for what is to follow. You get to be the host(ess) with the most(est). Advice will be earnestly sought from you, and accepted, opinions favored, influence sought. Get plenty of rest, as being the only grownup at the party can make you weary.
Capricorn (Dec 22-Jan 19): You may wish to develop some pressing matter which will keep you out of the public eye for most of June. Your Saturn is not well aspected, and the hangdog attitude will not be endearing. Rest assured that this will fade away before summer does. Sometimes you’re a Goth because you are; sometimes you just need to be.
Aquarius (Jan 20-Feb 18): Even the most harebrained schemes are provided with an ideal time for presentation. Oh boy, your prime opportunity to bamboozle on a global stage comes July 20th. Stock up on spangled costumes, megaphones and glassy eyed minions. You’ve got a shot at dazzling us mere mortals. If you act now, we will double your order.
Pisces (Feb 19-Mar 20): Oh heck, another two months of drama and stringy hair, heartfelt journal entries straggle up the margins of a battered journal, which will then be misplaced. Were it the early 1960’s, you could be restocking your fallout shelter. Do us all a favor, and stay out of sight until you can sey something cheerful. Don’t attempt to smile, you’ll frighten us.
